Chapter 1: A Year of Change

As I look back, 2023 stands out as one of the most exhilarating, difficult, and transformative years of my existence. Over the course of the year, I have:

• Explored 27 destinations
• Visited 5 different countries
• Competed in 14 Jiu-Jitsu tournaments
• Met an incredible partner
• Launched The Grappler's Diary on Instagram
• Relocated to a new city (Yee-haw!)
• Faced injuries (a few times)
• Improved with each setback
• Earned medals in the ADCC Trials
• Experienced love
• Authored around 200 online articles
• Written a book
• Conducted seminars across the United States
• Made new friends
• Discovered much about myself and ways to enhance my life

In this article, I aim to encapsulate my experiences throughout the year, reflect on the lessons I gleaned, and outline some ambitious goals for 2024. It might be lengthy, but it mirrors the year’s extensive journey. I hope this inspires you to craft your own year-end reflection.

The year had a challenging start.

The midpoint of my year was largely characterized by pain and hardship, which sums up the initial months. I invested considerable resources without seeing returns, trained relentlessly, traveled extensively, and grappled with the uncertainty of my future after leaving my teaching position and moving out of my Chicago apartment.

This phase was filled with experimentation, stress, and a couple of challenging competition losses alongside some injuries on the mat. Notably, I suffered a minor meniscus injury in February and a grade 2 hamstring injury in May.

Despite these trials, there were also remarkable moments. In late April, I met my girlfriend, MJ, in Austin, Texas, which became the highlight of the year’s first half. It took me a few months to truly recognize how special our relationship was.

Additionally, I secured victories in a challenging tournament in Chicago before heading to Austin, won a team competition in January in California, and led several seminars early in the year. This period was both profitable and invigorating, brimming with potential.

However, by mid-July, I relocated to Austin to train full-time at B-Team, facing extreme heat and demanding training sessions.

This move represented the most significant life change for me not just this year but in a long time. After over 20 years in Chicago, I now call a new state home. While I miss my hometown, friends, and family, the decision to relocate has been vital for both my athletic and personal growth.

Yet, the transition brought its challenges.

Within 48 hours of arriving in Austin, I encountered a minor mishap at my new gym due to a leg lock gone awry. Just two weeks later, I suffered a serious ankle injury at the IBJJF Chicago Open. Balancing my training for the ADCC Trials on one ankle and figuring out how to earn a living in a new city added to the stress as I traveled nationwide for seminars leading up to the European Trials in Warsaw in September.

It was an intense and chaotic time. Many are unaware that my ankle was in such bad shape that I considered surgery before the European Trials. Ultimately, just eight days prior to the event, I felt confident that I would recover without needing surgery.

After relocating, I found my rhythm.

As I prepared for the European Trials, I enjoyed a string of successful competitive performances. I won a match in Austin in July, faced an ADCC veteran a fortnight later (under ADCC rules), triumphed in a local tournament in Austin three weeks thereafter, and clinched victory at the Chicago Open, capping off four successful competition weekends in just six weeks.

Despite the ankle injury from the Chicago Open (which led me to compete at 88 kilograms for the European Trials), I was largely doing well. Although I faced financial strains and struggled to adapt to life in a new city, I was making progress. Things were looking up.

Going into the European Trials, buoyed by my girlfriend and new friends from the gym, I felt optimistic. I performed admirably at the Trials, earning a bronze medal and narrowly losing to the eventual winner due to a late guard pass. I also defeated an ADCC veteran and former Trials champion to secure the bronze.

Following the Trials, my girlfriend and I enjoyed a romantic getaway in Italy, undoubtedly the highlight of my year. We visited Venice, Ravello (a stunning spot on the Amalfi Coast), and Rome. It was a refreshing break from training before a grueling camp ahead for the ADCC East Coast Trials.

This was when I truly began to learn significant lessons about myself, my aspirations, and how to achieve them.

Crisis in Atlantic City

The ADCC East Coast Trials proved to be quite the challenge. Upon returning from Europe, I fell ill and spent two days bedridden, missing four days of training. After a week of intensive training to compensate for lost time, I fell sick again upon landing in Chicago. I was there for a friend's wedding, to teach seminars, and to finalize my preparations for the East Coast Trials.

When the Trials came, I was not at my best. Although I achieved my best weight cut ever at 77 kg, my health was far from optimal, and I was unprepared for another rigorous ADCC Trials just four weeks post-medaling at 88 kg in Europe.

I ended up losing in the round of 16 to an opponent I had previously beaten, which left me feeling terrible about the match and my decision to move across the country for Jiu-Jitsu. Normally, I take losses in stride, but this one hit hard.

Afterward, I did the only thing I knew: I persevered.

Finishing the Year Strong

This year has been characterized by constant travel, and I concluded it by hitting the road again. After competing for two consecutive weekends in November and performing significantly better (it's remarkable what consistent training can achieve), I enjoyed a lovely Thanksgiving in Austin with my girlfriend and sister before hitting the road yet again.

As I write this, I am still traveling and will be on the road when you read it. I wrapped up 2023 with a month filled with travel—Austin to Chicago to London to Chicago to Tucson to Chicago to San Diego, back to Austin.

I competed twice and participated in Combat Jiu-Jitsu for the first time. In the last two months of the year, I fought four times, engaged in 13 matches, and even got hit live on UFC Fight Pass in front of my girlfriend, who has been incredibly supportive.

Additionally, I concluded the year with a wealth of positive writing momentum. My Jiu-Jitsu writing Instagram has been steadily growing, I've completed my first book, and I have plenty of creative ideas lined up for the future.

I'm still collaborating with one ghostwriting client and looking to take on new clients in the coming year. My second instructional video on BJJ is about to be released. With two competitions and two seminars already planned for 2024, I see a promising path ahead.

Despite ongoing struggles, there is a silver lining in every challenge I face. Life is good; it's just been a demanding year. I'm optimistic that many positive developments await in the new year.

Closing Thoughts

With just two days left in the year, my girlfriend is taking me to see Zach Bryan, whose music has been a source of strength during tough moments this year. There's something poetic about attending the concert with her, as she's been my rock through the challenges I encountered.

While 2023 had its fair share of difficulties—losses, injuries, stress, and more—it has been far from a negative year. In fact, it has been a year filled with richness.

I experienced joy, triumph, failure, anxiety, love, and everything in between. I accomplished numerous things, but the most significant achievement was my refusal to settle or give up. I found an extraordinary partner, traveled to Italy, earned a medal at the ADCC Trials, and relocated to Texas to pursue my dreams. I transformed my life from a state of feeling lost in my previous home to one of fulfillment and excitement about what lies ahead.

Sure, I still feel a bit apprehensive, but my sense of fulfillment is so profound that it fuels my enthusiasm. This makes 2023 the most substantial victory I've ever had.

Looking ahead, here are my key goals for 2024, shaped by my experiences in 2023:

• Significant technical advancement in Jiu-Jitsu—I have a fresh perspective on training that excites me more than ever.
• Teach more Jiu-Jitsu classes.
• Travel less, focusing only on destinations I genuinely wish to visit.
• Win an ADCC Trials.
• Publish the book I mentioned earlier.
• Rebuild my freelance writing clientele.
• Establish a new life in Austin with my gym and girlfriend.
• Create new writing projects to explore untapped ideas.

Next, here are some of the best content I've consumed in 2023:

Most Transformative Blog Posts:

"Ten Unimaginable Life Lessons You Can Learn from Anthony Bourdain" by Tim Denning—As someone who found comfort in watching Parts Unknown during my youth, this piece resonated deeply with me.

"My 2022 Yearly Review" by Dickie Bush—Following Dickie on Twitter inspired me to write my own yearly reflection. His review is longer than mine but is an excellent resource for anyone looking to enhance their habits and routines.

Best Books:

I read 25 books this year, with two standing out:

"When Breath Becomes Air" by Paul Kalanithi—A profound memoir by a brilliant neurosurgeon diagnosed with terminal lung cancer at 36. Best Quote: "If the unexamined life was not worth living, was the unlived life worth examining?"

"Island" by Aldous Huxley—A must-read if you enjoyed Brave New World. It provided insights into mindfulness, deep thinking, and living a peaceful life. It pairs wonderfully with The Book of Life by Krishnamurti, one of my favorite reads last year. Best Quote: "It's dark because you are trying too hard. Lightly child, lightly..."

A Few Favorite Tweets:

"The Italians know how to live, the French how to think, and the Americans how to work..."—A tweet from @vanyaaix that resonated with me, especially after all my travels this year.

"Be who you want to be right now..."—A powerful closing line from @thedulab that encouraged me to believe in myself.

Most Helpful Podcast Episodes:

"Dan Koe & Dickie Bush On One-Person Businesses, Creative Workflows, and Lifestyle Design"—An inspiring conversation about creativity and lifestyle design.

"Sahil Bloom—Become A Magnet For Success | The Danny Miranda Podcast 218"—Sahil's insights on success and work-life balance were enlightening.

Most Enjoyable Show:

"Ted Lasso"—My girlfriend and I binge-watched the final season, and it left a lasting impression with its heartfelt humor.

Most Impactful Musical Albums:

"Caamp" by Caamp—Though released in 2016, I discovered it this year, and it brought me comfort during tough times.

"Zach Bryan" by Zach Bryan—His music resonated deeply with me, particularly tracks like "Spotless" and "Tourniquet."

Favorite Culinary Experiences:

Carbonara in Rome—The best meal I had during my trip to Italy on our last night.

Lobster in Mexico—Dining on authentic seafood overlooking the Pacific was unforgettable.

Top Travel Destinations:

Ravello, Amalfi Coast (Italy)—This stunning location has been my favorite for two consecutive years.

London, England—Despite the weather, London is filled with history and vibrant activities, and I hope to return soon.

My free ebook on lifestyle design.

The first video titled "How I Do My End Of Year Reflection And Goal Setting" explores personal growth and setting intentions for the new year.

The second video, "Year End Reflection 2020 | Bullet Journal Spread," offers creative ideas for documenting reflections and goals through bullet journaling.